Thursday, September 25, 2008
Numbers 4 and 5
Getting that warmth today and probably tomorrow, fourth and fifth stage and some of the third. But i admit to cheating on stage 1 and and 2 and most of 3. (I don't write like Thoreau, but sometimes i think like him) Have two cords of firewood dumped in the yard to stack. Some to split. I am going to be a sore puppy tomorrow, but every one that goes onto the pile is one more step toward winter security. Seeing chickadees checking out the feeders now, too, so I am going to have to go get some seed. Partly sunny today. Funny, the years I drove boats, i lived in a place that was very rainy in the summer time. Often we would leave in the morning in fog or low overcast and rain. We used to describe the weather as partly thinning and partly thickening. The thing about places like that is, when you get a sunny day, it is glorious and you appreciate it so much. A bright day on the water, with myriad shades of green up the mountainsides and snow-capped peaks in the distance can take your breath away. Does it seem like i am sitting here at the computer procrastinating? To steal a phrase from my daughter who pulled it off in the perfect situation: I'll get back to you on that.
The picture is a visitor to the feeder last year, a hairy woodpecker.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
It had to happen on the Equinox
Monday, September 22, 2008
Random metaphor at the Equinox
Thursday, September 18, 2008
It's sad, oh so SAD
I have always liked Keith Olberman since I first saw him as a sports announcer on ESPN. When he showed up on MSNBC with a news show I made it a point to watch every chance I could. I like what I called news with attitude. I saw the show as unbiased and cutting edge. Then began the vicious attacks on Sarah Palin. And that was when the new discovery came. I am not a big fan of her politics, but I have enjoyed her rise to fame, have been astonished at the attacks on her and have gotten a little defensive about it. She may be a flawed politician, but she is OUR flawed politician. What amazed me was how nasty Olberman got and how petty, and how little he even tried to get at anything like truth. Several times I have had to turn it off. The discovery was that I saw him as unbiased because his biases are the same as mine. Until Sarah. So, now I have some growing to do. But, then, so does he.
The latest was the most outrageous, when he started criticizing her for having a tanning bed in the governor’s mansion. What exactly is the matter with that? Do we want our government people working 24 hours a day? Are they not allowed to find a way to relax? Nixon put a bowling alley in the White House. Eisenhower had a putting green on the lawn. Kennedy had his own recreation, which the press chose to ignore. Clinton with the same interests, was impeached for it. Is it so awful that Sarah Palin has a tanning bed? The governor before her bought that million dollar jet airplane.
Criticizing the tanning bed might have been tolerable, but then someone in state government suggested she might use it to fight depression. Olberman immediately jumped all over that, adding his own diagnosis to elevate the problem to clinical depression. What the aide should have explained and Olberman should have taken the time to find out was that just about anyone who lives in the north suffers some measure of depression.
It is called seasonal affective disorder (SAD) and it affects everyone in the north to some degree. It is caused by a lack of sunlight. When a person does not absorb enough sunshine, the pineal gland causes depression. More in some people less in others but most likely a little bit in everyone. In winter we get a little more than 5 hours of daylight on the shortest day where I live, less as you go north until north of the Arctic Circle whole days, weeks and months go by without a sunrise. I used to feel the effects of it until I learned more. What I do now is try to get outdoors for a while during the brightest part of the day and on top of that most of the lamps in the house hold full-spectrum color bulbs, which also helps. Fortunately the new mini fluorescents are full spectrum so I save a little on electricity, too. There are SAD lights available specifically for it but they are very expensive. When you drive to work in the dark and come home in the dark and stay indoors all day, you are very susceptible and need to do something about it. If Sarah Palin uses a tanning bed to help out, well, good for her. And by calling her clinically depressed, Olberman has managed to slander everyone in the world who lives north of 60.
Let’s see him bring it on north and broadcast his show from here for a couple of weeks around the Winter Solstice. Let him experience some of that depression and see if he goes clinical on us.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
A bear moon
Monday, September 15, 2008
Oh, no, SWANS!
Since she was old enough to understand them, my daughter and I have been going to movies together. Though we often disagree on interpretations, our tastes in general are alike. When you watch movies with someone for that long, you develop a string of communication, sometimes with nothing said. One thing we always agreed on was swans. We knew if we saw swans in a movie somebody was going to get kissed.
The minute swans appeared, there would be a hushed:
“Oh no, SWANS!”
“Ewwwww”
“Oh, yuck”
“Hide your eyes.”
Then it would degenerate into uncontrollable laughter at our insight into American film.
Why did that thought come up? The swans came back to the pond yesterday: three of them all clean and white swimming among the bronzed lily pads. They usually stay until freezeup.
I looked around, but, nope, nobody to kiss.
Friday, September 12, 2008
Blowin' in the wind
The insightful news heads are reporting the storm at this point is a cartegory 2 hurricane, saying it might go to category 3. Now get this: the upper limit for a category 2 is 111 mph winds. Sustained winds being reported right now are 110. You have to wonder how much worse that 1 mph makes it. That is the problem with categorizing anything, you impose strict limits that might under or overstate the actuality.
For example, the weather service calls it a storm at 63 knots and a hurricane at 64 knots. Here is an anecdote about what a difference that makes.
I wrote a story years ago about a storm that tore through the Aleutian Islands. One of the sources was Peggy Dyson who lives in Kodiak. Her husband Oscar was one of the original king crab fishermen. He made his millions and got out before it crashed. An orginial “Deadliest Catch” guy. In those days there was very little weather forecasting in the Bering Sea, so Peggy got a serious single sideband radio and called Oscar twice a day with a weather report. In time other fishermen began listening in, too. Then came the requests: “It’s our anniversary, could you send some flowers to my wife?” The weather service knew a gem when they heard one and eventually hired her and set her up as the broadcast station for weather in Alaska waters. No one on the ocean missed Peggy on 4125 at 8 a.m. and 6 p.m. and her call “Hello, all mariners.” There was something comforting just in her voice, She could forcast the most unimagineable bad weather in the same voice she might tell you the cat had kittens. (Not like these new talking heads who have to inject drama and outrage with inflection in every news story they report.)
So, for a storm story in the Aleutians, she seemed the perfect source. She told me basically what she knew and then came this anecdote. Now, you have to understand this storm actually blew the house (cabin) off a fishing boat. A fisherman who weathered it went in to see Peggy when he returned to Kodiak. And this was why. According to her, in a very angry voice he told her, “Damn it Peggy, we get 110 knot winds out there all the time. But you went and called it a hurricane and scared the hell out of everybody.”
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Reflections redux
Slideshow
Relief
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
We don't give a damn how they do it on the Outside
Another example: On a sailing trip things go wrong and it is one of the Murphy’s law corollaries the farther offshore you go, the bigger the problem. I sailed with a good friend once and learned a way to think from him. When something went wrong, he always had a plan to fix it. But, even more, when the fix didn’t work, he already had the next plan. And if that one didn’t work, he had another. I think we might have gotten six deep into that process once. The point is, while we were making the fix, he was already thinking about what we could do if it didn’t work. Since then I have learned to think that way also. And you have to learn to fix your own dumb mistakes.
Here’s one. One night sailing, the binnacle light went out. That’s the one that illuminates the compass. So two experienced boat guys and basic mechanics, in our brightness we taped a flashlight to the binnacle next to the compass so we could see to steer. And on we sailed. Next night, 24 hours later and on the same watch, I looked at my friend and said, “You don’t suppose that flashlight affects the compass, do you?” OMG. Our mouths dropped open. What we finally decided to do was one guy stared at the compass, while the other carefully removed the tape, then pulled the flashlight away quickly. That way the guy watching could see how far the compass swung. 5 degrees. Between Cape Flattery off Seattle and Hawaii, 1 degree off and you miss the whole Hawaiian archipelago by 80 miles. You wouldn’t even see it! But knowing we were 5 degrees off course for 24 hours we could adjust the course and make up for it and all came out good.
You have to be self-sufficient, you have to know how to meet a situation. You don't call for help. You solve it and move on, It is that innate Alaska, maybe, sense of survival. With her experience Sarah Palin has it and it is doubtful many Outsiders understand it, let alone appreciate it as an attribute. Skookum. Explain that inside the Beltway.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
On the wings of a dust brown crane
A wedge of sandhill cranes flew over the road this morning all of us on our way home. As light came through the clouds, it highlighted the first yellows showing up among the green leaves. That nip in the air meant something for sure. The state fair is over, kids are back in school and oh boy are we in an election season.
In case somebody isn’t paying attention our governor has been nominated for vice president. A little more than two years ago she was mayor of the town next to this one, an Alaska version of a valley girl (the Matanuska Valley). The rap on her is she doesn’t have the experience for the job, but a lot of people didn’t think she had the experience to be governor either, and now she works with something like an 80 percent approval rating. Some people rise to the occasion and she seems to be one of them. The big thing in her favor is she is an outsider. She beat three former governors on the way to winning that election, including the incumbent, who came in third in his own party’s primary. Now she is up there on the national stage, a woman who had to quick get a passport last year to go visit Alaska troops in the Middle East because she had never been overseas before, and drawing all kinds of focus on the north. We could do without that, but nothing’s going to stop it. I have to admit I am pretty darned proud. I disagree with so many of the things she stands for, but I like her, and I just have to smile every time I see her there on TV with all those famous, politically powerful people and holding her own, her family with her.
The media sniping had to be expected. Sometimes my own profession embarrasses me. She stepped into that spotlight and I suppose expected it, but how hard the press tries to find some dirt amazes even me. A coworker this morning said it was awful how she paraded her family in front of everyone in her drive for public office. But, to my mind that is part of it, everyone brings the family along and my guess is the family is well prepared for it. They may be reluctant but the smiles from most of them showed they were happy to be there and proud of Mom and what she was doing. Pretty common knowledge the governor’s daughter is pregnant, and her being there also offended this person. But my thought is, this is a family, they are going to support each other and not hide their problems, but instead show the world how they deal with things like this and that is up front and honest, not try to hide it. That is support. I don’t suppose many people do, but I felt some sympathy for the boyfriend. Try to imagine this from a male point of view. You finally achieve every boy’s dream and have sex. A mistake is made and you find yourself dealing with a pregnancy. That can be traumatic enough. But then imagine your mistake ON THE FRONT PAGE OF EVERY NEWSPAPER IN THE WORLD.
I sent a note to my son at college warning him this was yet another reason to practice safe sex.
There is another person in that family to keep an eye on and she is the little scamp Piper, the governor’s youngest daughter. You may have seen her during the speech licking her fingers and then damping down a cowlick in her baby brother’s hair. There was a great picture made of her during the festivities surrounding the governor’s inauguration here. She was standing in front of her mother in a cute little dress, arms folded across her chest, something of a scowl across her mouth and her eyes cast wickedly to the side as if wondering, “now how am I going to work this to my advantage.” The Secret Service is going to have their hands full with that one. Could there be a movie in it?
All in all, except for being somewhat under the microscope, not a bad day to be an Alaskan, and watching those sandhill cranes heading south on the winds of change.
Best headlines ever
Naked pair fed LSD gummy worm to dog
Owners of a Noah's Ark replica file a lawsuit over rain damage
In Southcentral Alaska earthquake, damage originated in the ground, engineers say
A headline that could only be written in Alaska: At state cross country, Glacier Bears and Grizzlies sweep, Lynx repeat, Wolverines make history — and a black bear crosses the trail
Man kills self before shooting wife and daughter
Alabama governor candidate caught in lesbian sperm donation scandal
Sister hits moose on way to visit sister who hit moose.
Man caught driving stolen car filled with radioactive uranium, rattlesnake, whiskey
Man loses his testicles after attempting to smoke weed through a SCUBA tank
Church Mutual Insurance won't cover Church's flood damage because it's 'an act of God'
Homicide victims rarely talk to police
Meerkat Expert Attacked Monkey Handler Over Love Affair with Llama Keeper
GOP congressman opposes gun control because gay marriage leads to bestiality
Owner of killer bear chokes to death on sex toy
Support for legalizing pot hits all-time high
Give me all your money or my penguin will explode
How zombie worms have sex in whale bones
Crocodile steals zoo worker's lawn mower
Woman shot by oven while trying to cook waffles
Nude beach blowjob jet ski fight leads to wife's death
Woman stabs husband with squirrel for not buying beer Christmas Eve
GOPer files complaint against Democrat for telling the truth about Big Lie social posts
Man shot dead on Syracuse Street for 2nd time in 2 days
Alaska woman punches bear in face, saves dog
Johnny Rotten suffers flea bite on his penis after rescuing squirrel
Memorable quotations
The best way to know you are having an adventure is when you wish you were home talking about it." — a mechanic on the Alaska State Ferry System. Or as in my own case planning how I will be writing it on this blog.
"You can't promote principled anti-corruption without pissing off corrupt people." — George Kent
"If only the British had held on to the airports, the whole thing might have gone differently for us." — Mick Jagger
"You can do anything as long as you don't scare the horses." — a mother's favorite saying recalled by a friend
A poem is an egg with a horse inside” — anonymous fourth grader
“My children will likely turn my picture to the wall but what the hell, you only get old once." — Joe May
“Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.” — Ernest Hemingway
When I write, I feel like an armless, legless man with a crayon in his mouth.― Kurt Vonnegut
“If you wrote something for which someone sent you a cheque, if you cashed the cheque and it didn't bounce, and if you then paid the light bill with the money, I consider you talented.”―Stephen King
The thing about ignorance is, you don't have to remain ignorant. — me again"
"It was like the aftermath of an orgasm with the wrong partner." – David Lagercrants “The Girl in the Spider’s Web.”
Why worry about dying, you aren't going to live to regret it.
Never debate with someone who gets ink by the barrel" — George Hayes, former Alaska Attorney General who died recently
My dear Mr. Frost: two roads never diverge in a yellow wood. Three roads meet there. — @Shakespeare on Twitter
Normal is how somebody else thinks you should act.
"The mark of a great shiphandler is never getting into situations that require great shiphandling," Adm. Ernest King, USN
Me: Does the restaurant have cute waitresses?
My friend Gail: All waitresses are cute when you're hungry.
I'm not a writer, but sometimes I push around words to see what happens. – Scott Berry
I realized today how many of my stories start out "years ago." What's next? Once upon a time?"
“The rivers of Alaska are strewn with the bones of men who made but one mistake” - Fred McGarry, a Nushagak Trapper
Many people hear voices when no one is there. Some of them are called mad and are shut up in rooms where they stared at walls all day. Others are called writers and they do pretty much the same thing. – Meg Chittenden
A non-writing writer is a monster courting insanity. – Franz Kafka
We are all immortal until the one day we are not. – me again
If the muse is late, start without her – Peter S. Beagle
Substitute ‘damn’ every time you’re inclined to write ‘very;’ your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be. ~Mark Twain Actually you could do the same thing with the word "really" as in "really cold."
If you are looking for an experience that will temper your vanity, this is it. There's no one to impress when you're alone on the trap line. – Michael Carey quoting his father's journal
Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing. – Benjamin Franklin
It’s nervous work. The state you need to write in is the state that others are paying large sums of money to get rid of. – Shirley Hazzard
So far as I can remember, there is not one word in the Gospels in praise of intelligence -- Bertrand Russell
You know that I always just wanted to have a small ship to take stuff from a place that had a lot of that stuff to a place that did not have a lot of that stuff and so prosper.—Jackie Faber, “The Wake of the Lorelei Lee”
If you attack the arguer instead of the argument, you lose both
If an insurance company won’t pay for damages caused by an “act of God,” shouldn’t it then have to prove the existence of God? – I said that
I used to think getting old was about vanity—but actually it’s about losing people you love. Getting wrinkles is trivial. – Eugene O’Neill
German General to Swiss General: “You have only 500,000 men in your army; what would you do if I invaded with 1 million men?”
Swiss General: “Well, I suppose every one of my soldiers would need to fire twice.”
Writing is the only thing that when I do it, I don’t feel I should be doing something else.—Gloria Steinem
Exceed your bandwidth—sign on the wall of the maintenance shop at the West Coast/Alaska Tsunami Warning Center
One thing I do know, if you keep at it, you usually wind up getting something done.—Patricia Monaghan
Do you want to know what kind of person makes the best reporter? I’ll tell you. A borderline sociopath. Someone smart, inquisitive, stubborn, disorganized, chaotic, and in a perpetual state of simmering rage at the failings of the world.—Brett Arends
It is a very simple mind that only knows how to spell a word one way.—Andrew Jackson
3:30 is too late or too early to do anything—Rene Descartes
Everything is okay when it’s 50-below as long as everything is okay. – an Alaskan in Tom Walker’s “The Seventymile Kid”
You can have your own opinion but you can’t have your own science.—commenter arguing on a story about polar bears and global warming
He looks at three ex wives as a good start—TV police drama
Talkeetna: A friendly little drinking town with a climbing problem.—a handmade bumper sticker
“You’re either into the wall or into the show”—Marco Andretti on giving it all to qualify last at the 2011 Indy 500
Makeup is not for the faint of heart—the makeup guerrilla
“I’m going to relax in a very adult manner.”—Danica Patrick after sweating it out and qualifying half an hour before Andretti
“Asking Congress to come back is like asking a mugger to come back because he forgot your wallet.”—a roundtable participant on Fox of all places
As Republicans go further back in the conception process to define when life actually begins, I am beginning to think the eventual definition will be life begins in the beer I was drinking when I met her.—me again
Hunting is a “critical element for the long-term conservation of wood bison.”—a state department of Fish and Game official explaining why the state would not go along with a federal plan to reintroduce wood bison in Alaska because the agreement did not specifically allow hunting
Each day do something that won’t compute – anon
I can’t belive I still have to protest this shit – a sign carriend by an elderly woman at an Occupy demonstration
Life should be a little nuts or else it’s just a bunch of Thursdays strung together—Kevin Costner as Beau Burroughs in “Rumor has it”
You’re just a wanker whipping up fear —Irish President Michael D. Higgins to a tea party radio announcer
Being president doesn’t change who you are; it reveals who you are—Michelle Obama
Sports malaprops
Commenting on an athlete with hearing impairment he said the player didn’t show any “uncomfortability.” “He's not doing things he can't do."
"… there's a fearlessment about him …"
"He's got to have the lead if he's going to win this race." "
"Kansas has always had the ability to score with the basketball."
"NFL to put computer chips in balls." Oh, that's gotta hurt.
"Now that you're in the finals you have to run the race that's going to get you on the podium."
"It's very important for both sides that they stay on their feet."
This is why you get to hate sportscasters. Kansas beats Texas for the first time since 1938. So the pundits open their segment with the question "let's talk about what went wrong." Wrong? Kansas WON a football game! That's what went RIGHT!
"I brought out the thermostat to show you how cold it is here." Points to a thermometer reading zero in Minneapolis.
"It's tough to win on the road when you turn the ball over." Oh, really? Like you can do all right if you turn the ball over playing at home?
Cliches so embedded in sportscasters' minds they can't help themselves: "Minnesota fell from the ranks of the undefeated today." What ranks? They were the only undefeated team left.
A good one: A 5'10" player went up and caught a pass off a defensive back over six feet tall. The quote? "He's got some hops."
Best homonym of the day so far: "It's all tied. Alabama 34, Kentucky 3." Oh, Tide.
"Steve Hooker commentates on his Olympic pole vault gold medal." When "comments" just won't do.
"He's certainly capable of the top ten, maybe even higher than that."
"Atlanta is capable of doing what they're doing."
"Biyombo, one of seven kids from the Republic of Congo." In the NBA? In America? In his whole country?
"You can't come out and be aggressive but you can't come out and be unaggressive."
"They're gonna be in every game they play!"
"First you have to get two strikes on the hitter before you get the strikeout."
"The game ended in the final seconds." You have to wonder when the others ended or are they still going on?
How is a team down by one touchdown before the half "totally demoralized?"
"If they score runs they will win."
"I think the matchup is what it is"
After a play a Houston defender was on his knees, his head on the ground and his hand underneath him appeared to clutch a very sensitive part of the male anatomy. He rolled onto his back and quickly removed his hand. (Remember the old Cosby routine "you cannot touch certain parts of your body?") Finally they helped the guy to the sideline and then the replay was shown. In it the guy clearly took a hard knee between his thighs. As this was being shown, one of the announcers says, "It looks like he hurt his shoulder." The other agrees and then they both talk about how serious a shoulder injury can be. Were we watching the same game?
"Somebody is going to be the quarterback or we're going to see a new quarterback."
"That was a playmaker making a play.”