Those who forget the lessons of history…

Mitt Romney looked pretty funny today carrying unnecessary supplies for the relief of Sandy victims to a truck during a "disaster relief" political rally in Ohio.  That's probably the most he's lifted since he had to carry his own cooler full of Perrier and single malt scotch to his boat last summer.

The Red Cross said thank you for the effort but receiving well-intentioned food and other supplies actually creates more work for volunteers who have to sort, clean, ship and distribute the accumulation of unrelated materials.  The Red Cross prefers money so the appropriate supplies can be purchased and distributed efficiently through its established organization, often having to leave unsolicited supplies on the side until someone can get to them.

Also as the day progressed, Romney's infamous statement that the Federal Emergency Management Agency ought to be dismantled and the job sent back to individual states came up several times.  How would you like to be Romney telling that to New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie today? In the primary debate where he said that, he went further saying it would be even better if emergency response could be sent all the way back to the private sector with businesses becoming the first and subsequent responders to disasters.  That actually works in some cases, for instance there are private oil spill response companies, mostly who provide management teams.

However even those are overseen by a unified command that usually includes the U/S. Coast Guard.

Also try to picture a company maintaining an inventory of the amount of equipment needed to respond to a Sandy-sized disaster for years, just in case it might be needed.  Would businessman Mitt see that as a sound investment?  To be honest there are ways around that and nationwide, oil spill responders and people who fight wildfires have found ways to cascade equipment when it's needed.  But that equipment is usually days if not weeks away.  A disaster like Sandy demands immediate response.  (Speaking of immediate response, did anyone pick up on the former Bush FEMA director (remember Brownie during Katrina) today accusing President Obama of responding too quickly?)

Try to remember from history class in high school why the government took over firefighting and who was responsible for it.  I have friend who is studying for her GED test and I am guessing she has a better chance of knowing the answer than a Republican running for president in 2012.

The person responsible was Benjamin Franklin. That name should ring a bell with someone.  Hint: the Liberty Bell.

During Franklin's time in Philadelphia, insurance companies owned the firefighting businesses.  When a person bought fire insurance for his building,  the company affixed a plaque to his house to identify it for that company's fire department. Firefighters responding would only put out fires on buildings with their company's metal signs visible.  Picture the fire in Queens last night where 80 homes burned.  Now add to the melee maybe 20 different fire departments answering the call but only working on fires in buildings their companies insured.  Franklin saw buildings left to burn to the ground because they had the wrong insurance plaque.  That led to the formation of the nation's first government-funded fire department which became the model for today's firefighting organizations.

Now we have a presidential candidate who wants to return to a system run by the private sector.  Look at what private insurers have done to the cost of medical care in this country, the lessons of private firefighting learned in the 18th century, and it's not too difficult to figure out what will  happen if disaster response reverts to private providers.  If you lived in a hurricane zone (and in case you haven't noticed, that zone is getting bigger) imagine the cost of private companies being your initial responders.  

Leave that grandma on the roof, she has a different insurer.  We can only sandbag this house.  We can't evacuate these kids because they can’t prove they have our insurance. Or as in the example above, 20 companies fighting what amounts to a single huge fire. Or, taken to an illogical extreme but knowing the Romney history, what if the firefighters themselves had to come from China? Just call Bain Fire Protection LLC, Shanghai. Chaos.

Think about it. We complain because the Republicans are trying to dump reforms that have been in place since the 1930s.  This one goes back to the 1790s for crying out loud.  There weren't even Republicans or Democrats at that point.

Those who forget history are bound to repeat it. That sounds like it might have been one of Ben Franklin's witticisms. And, by the way, why can't there be a Franklin around when we really need one?

If you really want to help, forget about canned foods and bottled water:  Text 90999.  That will donate $10 to the Red Cross. Or visit the organization's web site at redcross.org.  It's not just me, that's what the President advised today as well.

HMS Bounty replica lost off Cape Hattaras

HMS Bounty with sails raised. But we know, don't we; all that sail, calm water, even keel, 
what's wrong with this picture? (Photo from HMS Bounty facebook page)

UPDATE June 14, 2014: In its findings, the Coast Guard Board of Inquiry blamed the captain and the ship's onshore management for the disaster.  Here's the report from CNN.

UPDATE FEB. 20, 2013:  Here's some new insight into the sinking written during the official Coast Guard inquiry.

HMS Bounty went down Monday off Cape Hattaras, a place with history dating back to pirate times where ships have had their difficulties.  That reads like a headline that might have been published more than 200 years ago, but, of course it was not the original ship. It was a replica launched in 1962 for the movie that starred Trevor Howard as William Bligh and Marlon Brando as Fletcher Christian in the 1960s.  This version also had been in a "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie along with participating in several tall ships gatherings.

The ship was sailing south attempting to avoid Hurricane Sandy and reach its home port in St. Petersburg, Florida.  On the group's facebook page there are chart positions showing the ship attempted to sail east of the storm and thus avoid the worst of it.  On the page the captain defends the decision. There are a few pictures of the seas the ship encountered.  Keep in mind a ship like this is built to withstand storms at sea and there was every reason to believe it could have handled conditions as they were predicted.  Generally among mariners a ship is considered safer on the open ocean than in a harbor during a severe storm.

There was some conjecture around the sinking but nothing solid so it is best to wait for a cause to come from an official inquiry.  One report did say the ship's engines failed so that could have been a contributing factor.  That is best left for the investigators.  No matter what is learned the ship is gone.

HMS Bounty founders off Cape Hattaras
(U.S. Coast Guard photo)

Whenever a ship goes down at sea it raises emotions among other sailors, some of relief that we weren't there and others of sadness at the loss of kindred spirits and in this case the loss of a grand ship as well.  The sight of a tall ship under full sail is one that will remain in your memory forever. Those ships are what the romance of the sea is all about, the stuff of fiction but also the stuff of the age of exploration, the stuff of great naval battles, the stuff of pirates and the stuff of the opening of the great trade routes on all the world's oceans.  When one goes down we all lose a bit of our heritage.  I know some of  my ancestors crossed the ocean in one and I expect most people can look back at their history and find a voyage under sail somewhere, some more romantic than others, to be sure.  What I mean there is  the most famous American settlers came over on the Mayflower, but then so did the Africans who were transferred as chattel to be slaves in the New World. But the latter can't be blamed on the ships themselves. The point is that Monday a piece of the great maritime heritage, even if it was a replica, went down off Cape Hattaras and that's a loss for us all.

All of it is not sad.  There is a grand story to go with the sinking. The Coast Guard rescued 14 crew members in seas of around 18 feet. Bligh didn't have that option when he sailed the ship's ancestral namesake.  The pilots who fly those helicopters and the rescue divers who fly with them are an amazing group of people.  An awful lot of Alaska mariners owe their lives to these guys. The same type of crew is who the "Deadliest Catch" guys call from the Bering Sea. The movie "The Guardian" gives them a good treatment.  Here is a link to the Coast Guard web site posting about the operation.  Not many words there to describe what actually happened, considering divers went into the water, in those waves, and one by one loaded crew members into a basket so they could be lifted to the helo hovering overhead.

As is often the case in a sinking, two crew members were lost.  The body of one was recovered, but at last report the captain was still missing. Claudene Christian, who grew up in Anchorage and graduated from West High School, was the one who died and whose body was recovered.  This is where the story takes a dramatic turn.  Does her name sound familiar?

It should.  You see, one person posting on the facebook page wrote that Claudene Christian was a direct descendant of Fletcher Christian known for instigating the mutiny on the original Bounty.

You can have your own opinion, but you can't have your own science

This video is hilarious.  It is a comedy sketch, not a real newscast which it should be.

It's fairly easy to jump on the climate change bandwagon either pro or con when a major weather event shows up.  A couple of years ago when Washington, D.C. was hit by a huge winter snow storm, the deniers were out in force pointing out a winter blizzard could hardly occur when global warming is under way.  Of course those people were noticeably quiet during last summer's rash of heat records and drought.

Another silence so loud it screams pretty much ignored the issue during the campaign for president this year.  It didn't come up once during the debates and was largely ignored during the rest of the shouting despite melting in the north that left the smallest accumulation of ice around the North Pole in history.

Of course a lot of it is showing up today with  the approach of a massive storm onto the largest population center in the United States, a hurricane whose storm circle extends from the Carolinas into Maine with New York City right in the bull's eye.  Have to wonder how much would be said if that storm were approaching Seattle instead, or Alaska.

Even before the storm hit, the proponents of global warming were raising their flags.  And just as quickly the opposition was making accusations like "only a liberal would politicize a storm like this."  Of course that same group didn't politicize the big snowstorm a couple of winters ago.  Not at all.  Unless you count those Christians at the Westborough Baptist Church, who called the storm the wrath of god sent to punish a sinful world. Those are the same Christians who go to military funerals and carry signs saying those casualties of war died because America loves gay people.

Science holds the answer, but in an age of anti-intellectualism, science, at least in some circles is criticized and questioned as a vast liberal plot. It is kind of a sad state of affairs when ignorance actually gets a strong voice and intelligence is considered a weakness.

And while the Federal Emergency Management Agency mobilized ahead of the storm, everybody's favorite Republican reiterated his earlier call to eliminate FEMA.  Now, who is trying to politicize a growing disaster? You have to wonder what his former constituents in Massachusetts who are directly in the path of the storm think about that. It kind of recalls George Bush ignoring the Hurricane Katrina damage not so long ago.  What would the Romney plan be for an approaching storm?  We can all move to one of our other homes?

What shouldn't be argued, is that the earth is warming.  That is indisputable fact.  Arctic ice melted to its lowest level ever recorded this summer.  Water temperatures are up around the world. in fact, this storm grew stronger over an area that usually cools and weakens tropical storms because water temperature is higher.  What can be questioned is whether it is part of a natural cycle, caused by greenhouse gases created by men, or some combination of the two, which is most likely.  It is usually a sign of a distressed animal population when individuals are found in less habitable areas.  We are drilling for oil in the Arctic Ocean.  Just sayin'.

It brings to mind one of the few original thoughts I have had in my lifetime.  I once came up with phrase "too many people are trying to fix the blame instead of the problem."  Who cares what the contributing factors are?  The fact is, mankind can do things to alleviate the problem.  But those things are why there is no mention of it in political campaigns, why people push the issue under the table, why governments manipulate terminology to bury the problem as they did in one of the Carolinas, calling the water rise along the outer coast there occasional flooding rather than admit ocean levels are rising.

A shark swims along a New Jersey street. Chances are this is
a fake. According  to people who know, most photos of 
sharks in flood waters are.

Why is America universally sticking its figurative head in the sand?  Because any solution is gong to cost money to the largest single economic force ever seen on Earth.  What is that?  Simply: the fossil fuel industry.  Oil, gas, coal wield such power with the United States government that it can even change the terminology, stop legislation, belittle science, ignore warnings all to generate the biggest profits ever recorded.  Case in point.  Mitt Romney endorsed the use of "clean coal" during one of the debates. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS CLEAN COAL!  In 2008 in the period leading up to Christmas, the clean coal association broadcast commercials with animated lumps of coal dressed in Santa costumes singing about the attributes of clean coal to the tune of religious Christmas carols, even “Silent Night.” That is typical of energy industry solutions to environmental problems: Pour money into public relations and advertising to convince people they are doing the right thing. Apparently one person in the country believes them.

So, until our representatives stand up to the industry, we can watch ice melt, we can see stranded polar bears, we can watch flora and fauna from temperate climates creep north as permafrost melts and releases methane into the air, we can watch coastal areas disappear under water and islands submerge, we can see more drought, more wildfires, more and bigger storms, but nothing is going to change.  After all it is just a liberal plot to curtail oil and mine development, don't you know.  Or, maybe someone will sit up and notice when some of the effects hit at the centers of power.  As of this writing, about 4:30  pm Alaska Daylight Time (8:30 pm Eastern) Con Edison has shut off power to lower Manhattan as water has begun to flood into the streets there.  Hmm, what famous street crosses lower Manhattan?  With the power off and the trading floor subject to flooding how will we ever know how much our Exxon stock made today?

AFTERTHOUGHT: My apologies to the folks in the path of this storm who are going to be deeply affected for piling on a political argument.  Having weathered storms, I know it doesn't mean much to people getting battered what a bunch of people on dry land out of harm's way have to say.  What matters most is keeping your family and loved ones safe and alive and protecting your property where it is safe to do so. I am reasonably sure the rest of the country,with the exception of a few Christians, is pulling for those who are in hazard tonight.

'Perfect storm' is a way overused term, but ...

My daughter and I used to go to movies whenever we could, despite the fact that at times I embarrassed her with an outburst at some failure of  the movie  we were watching.  

For instance we still disagree on the first "Matrix."  I was fine with the movie through most of it, I mean, you accept the fantasy premise and it all works, but what got me was toward the end.  After the hero had gone through a period of doubt, he came back from an injury and as he was coming out of what appeared to be a coma, the heroine kissed him and it was then he realized he was THE ONE and assumed his semi-super powers.  At that point I said something like "oh come on" right out loud.  I was outraged that a reasonably good science fiction movie turned on the oldest fairy tale trick in the book, where the princess kisses the prince and all is well with the world.  Good grief.  My daughter disagrees, of course.

Another movie we saw where I did it again  was "A Perfect Storm," although we don't totally disagree on this one.  I had written a book in which I called the criminal-looking crew on a crab-fishing boat "thugs."  Early in the movie as the Andrea Gail was heading out to sea there was a shot of the crew standing on the work deck.  My daughter elbowed me and whispered "thugs."  I had to smile, so warming when something you wrote made an impression on your kids.  But that wasn't my outburst, and, it is not one we disagreed about, except for my impolite statement out loud in a movie theater.

When the storm the book and movie were named for, showed up, there was a still shot, which I assumed was a real satellite photo of the storm.  In it the entire East Coast of North America and the ocean offshore from Florida into Canada were covered by clouds.  Three low pressure systems came together to form that storm and at the center a spout of clouds rose from the otherwise flat layer, indicating a huge low pressure center.  That photo brought the mariner out in me as I looked at what was going on and without thinking I said way too loud, "Jesus Christ."  That got me another elbow in the ribs.

The photo looked a little bit like this one:

Hurricane Sandy centered off the coast of the Carolinas Saturday afternoon.  NOAA/NASA

 That's Hurricane Sandy approaching the East Coast with a path forecast to take it inland aimed straight at Western New York where I grew up and where I still have family. It's not a perfect storm in the sense of the one from the book, but the photo elicited almost the same response. I hope all the folks in the path of it along with my family take it seriously.  Like we used to say in the world of oil spill response, even if it doesn't happen, it's good training to respond. Too bad my daughter isn't here to throw another elbow into my ribs like she did the first time.

AN AFTERTHOUGHT: Because elements were predicted to come together to form this storm, some media outlets started calling it "Frankenstorm."  Cute, but given the seriousness of the potential damage this one can cause, the National Weather Service discouraged the use of that term and it has slowly faded away. Agreed.  Cute names tend to diminish the seriousness of events and these need to be taken seriously.

When did baseball players get fat?

Early baseball films showing Babe Ruth skipping around the bases after a home run, his ample upper body propelled on what looked like spindly thin legs bordered on the slapstick comedy that was popular at the time.  Ruth's  excesses at the dinner table, in the smoking cars of trains and at any bar he came across were as legendary in that era as his home runs.  His appearance was about as non-athletic as could be yet he changed the game in favor of the power hitters.

When I came up, at least from what I recall, there were some big guys all right, but they still appeared trim and athletic, no bulging stomachs,  but still with the broad shoulders, and legs that stretched the uniform trousers tight, but it seems that has changed as well.

Wednesday night Pablo Sandaval hit three home runs and from the looks of him it's a good thing because given his size it didn't look like he could have made it around the bases if he had found it necessary to actually run.  Give him credit; in the first two games he did make some nimble defensive moves around third base but in no way is he the model for the perfect athlete.  And, despite his defensive moves, he is no Brooks Robinson.

There are others in the lineups of both teams, including the guy who won the triple crown in the American League, the first such accomplishment in 45 years.  Even he looks overweight despite the loose fitting uniforms these guys wear today.

But the one who sent things over the edge was Prince Fielder.  This guy looks like a 28-year-old-candidate for a heart attack with blond-tipped dreadlocks.   Early in the game a coach urged him on in a run from first to home on a long single to deep left field at the foul line.  He was still running  as he approached home, something of an accomplishment in itself given the looks of him, but the third baseman relaying from the left fielder threw him out during an athletic but insufficient hook slide at the plate.

Later in the game he hit a slow high bouncer to the pitcher, leading to a double play that caught Fielder maybe 10 steps from first base on a play that should have been close, would have been with any kind of a fast runner.  It was then the announcer said he weighed 300 pounds.   Three hundred pounds?????   A baseball player????

Admittedly I don't watch a lot of baseball any more.  It is the game I would most like to play, but for watching I prefer the more consistent action of football or basketball.  In what little I have seen, I have noticed several players in this size and body shape and wonder what happened to the finesse game I came up playing.

Is the tradeoff for power hitting worth losing the speed of a base runner or a fielder who has to cover those huge major league outfields?  Apparently it is.  I mean, the two teams I am talking about are in the World Series while a lot of little athletic guys are sitting home watching, slugging down beer trying to gain weight for next season.

There is always talk about role models.  Is a 300-pound first baseman who can barely make it around the base paths any kind of role model?  For whom?  Put him in one of those big-is-beautiful commercials and forget it.  But as role models go, you have to wonder if these overweight guys aren't an outgrowth of the steroid era where now that they can't bulk up with drugs, they bulk up at the dinner table and because of their power hitting, excesses are excused and preferred to steroid injections.  

Babe Ruth would be right at home -- as long as they kept his alcohol consumption quiet.

And, what a treat it was after this to see one of the skinny guys beat a good throw to second and steal the base, qualifying all of us, every American, for a free taco.  I don't think a fat guy thrown out at the plate or failing to leg out a double play ball can do that for us. Then again, isn't the reward of a taco, particularly one laden with sour cream or guacamole  a bit of irony, considering  it is one of those super fatty feeds we are supposed to avoid? 

END NOTE:  Apparently Fielder has taken  quite a bit of heat over his weight, in fact may have lost out in the big bucks of free agency because of it.  Still he is playing in the World Series and just about all his detractors are not.

Here is a slide show of the 25 best-known fat guys in baseball history.  Interesting to note that three of them are playing in the 2012 World Series.

Nobody wins a debate, but education loses this one

ROMNESIA-- The unique ability to ignore what was said yesterday in order to say what is expedient today.  -- Believed to have first been used by President Obama during a speech Oct. 19, 2012, in Virginia.

Why is it that all the news coverage following a presidential debate involves who won and who lost?  The substance of what's said during the debates is lost among the next-day polls  and the constant blustering about winners and losers and gothcha moments the pundits think is important enough to fill the 24-hour news cycle.

What did they count in the first debate, 38 lies, misrepresentations and position reversals by Mitt Romney, but by every measure the news people tell us he won the debate and because of this received a bump in the omniscient polls.   And the reason he supposedly won was because President Obama took a reserved, more presidential demeanor, rather than get down in the muddy ditch with Romney.

Case in point: One statement Romney made in the first debate has yet to show up in any news story or opinion piece I have seen (if you can tell the difference any more).  He was asked how he would improve education in the United States, a pretty simple question.  As with every other question posed to this charlatan, his answer went to jobs.  I want to create jobs, he said, and with jobs people will have the money so they can move to a neighborhood that has better schools. WHAT????  How wealthy of him to say that.  Get rich with  a Romney-created job and leave your home and neighborhood so your kids can go to a better school.  It was surprising he didn't suggest paying to enter them in private school, like he did.  It is like it is outside his patrone consciousness that most people even when they have a good job slinging hamburgers can't afford or don't want to move to a better school district or send their children to Exeter.  After all, that's what the Romneys do.

And how the hell does students moving from one school district to another improve the education system?  It may give a few individuals a better education and then again maybe not.  First, what happens to the students who can't move?  How do they get a better education that could lift them out of their situation?  There wasn't even a hint of a suggestion how to improve schools for that portion of the population that even with new income can't or don't want to "move on up to a deluxe apartment in the sky."

Second, what would this huge migration of students whose parents now have prosperity with Romney jobs do to the schools in the better districts.  Romney once said school class size doesn't matter, so maybe in his world this isn't even a problem.  But, seriously, what happens when you overload classes in the better districts?  You get just what overcrowding does to schools everywhere else, overworked, stressed teachers; less individual attention to each student; less money to spend for each student; breakdowns in discipline, and an eventual decline in the quality of education.

However that is the partician Romney's plan for improving the education system in America:  Give a guy a job so he can move to a better neighborhood where the schools  are better.  Of course, education also will be better served when Mom is home every day by five to put a hot meal on the table and wash the clothes, too, another Romney program to improve life for the country's great unwashed.

But Romney won the debate according to people who apparently know how to score that sort of thing.  I don't because, you see, I came up in a school district that didn't think it was important to offer debating either as a class or a sport.  No one won either debate.  There was no scoreboard, no inning by inning tally of points,  no statistician, nothing, just impressions of demeanor, attitude, speaking ability, aggression, passivity, and a sort of celebrity-driven culture's image-influenced impressions of victory.

And education lost.  Romney did no put forth one idea that might improve education in this country.  But there is another aspect to his education policy.  Both he and his vice presidential pal Paul Ryan have proposed cuts to education funding as a way to their precious goal of balancing the budget on the backs of a majority of Americans without inconveniencing their rich pals.  And in the background sits their favorite pundit Rush Limbaugh, who voiced the opinion that teachers do not generate wealth, so do not help grow the economy, so by implication they are good targets for budget cutting.

But, Romney won that first debate. It was in all the news outlets, all over the Internet, in the papers, on TV, so it must be true.  Remember the old camera ads with Andre Agassi?  Image is everything?  That is the only way he could have "won."

What's wrong is that it's not important who won or lost.  What's important is the substance of what's said, the opportunity for the general public to hear where the candidates stand on various issues, an opportunity for the public to see the differences between candidates so as to make a more informed decision when they vote.  Waiting until the next day to hear talking heads tell us who won serves nobody.

Actually there is seldom an obvious winner in any traditional sense in a debate like these; mostly winning is in the minds of people who already supported one or the other of the contestants.  However, judging by what we have seen so far, a fairly substantial number of people are losing.

A woman with a chainsaw? If only

                      

"Lonely and looking for cuddle buddy"

There's a myth that still lingers in Alaska that there are many more men than women and that women ought to head north to find a mate.  One of the running jokes was a lot of men, but with the warning "the odds are good, but the goods are odd."  Probably true.  But the balance has changed.

These days there are just about as many women as men in the state so the enticement might have to be greater.  One of the early posts on this blog mentioned the personals ad for a "woman who owns a chainsaw, send picture of saw."  Well that one has been topped and by women advertising for men.

A few days ago while poking around the internet, I got to wondering what goes on in Craigslist personals.  I had never looked at them before and became intrigued with who might reach the point of looking for a partner in that arena.

In looking through the "women seeking men" category, I was at first amazed at how picky the women were.  I mean here they were in probably the last chance dating site, and looking still for the perfect man.  Some of them were even sort of nasty about it.  "Don't bother me if you don't meet the criteria." You got it.  I mean, you have to be getting pretty close to rock bottom looking for a partner on Craigslist, but still most of these women were looking for the prom king.  In all honesty, the other side wasn't any better. Guys were expecting to find Victoria's Secret models who were looking for their perfect mates in the same place.  Good luck with that.  As much as I laughed at these poor souls I also felt kind of sorry for them.  I mean to reach the point in life where you look for a mate in such a place and expect perfection is sad disillusionment.  You'd think at this point a warm body and functioning language skills would be sufficient, but nope, tall and handsome,  must love classical music, like candlelight dinners and know how to treat a woman like a lady.  Again, good luck with that on Craigslist.

The only thing worse, was the self descriptions.  After describing what they want in a perfect man: "I am a bbw (big beautiful woman, I learned later)  5 feet 2, 350 pounds, my friends tell me I have a beautiful smile."  I tried not to be too judgmental, after all, everyone deserves some happiness and body type and self image shouldn't be too big a part of it.  If I could have found one woman in a list of more than 50 who could write an ad and use the correct form of "your, you're" or "there they're their," I would have been attracted by the time I reached the last few ads.

But those aren't the ones that prompted this post.  It was that picture.  Under the title " Lonely and looking for a cuddle buddy" that woman posted a picture of herself shooting an assault rifle.  Good grief.  And there was another one.  When I went back looking for it, the ad had been taken down, so no photo. That woman had posted a picture of herself holding an automatic pistol in manicured fingers against some rather impressive cleavage.  Can you imagine those pictures on a dating site anywhere outside a war zone? Then again, maybe I am not giving them enough credit for knowing their audience. Here, I am sure those two received considerable attention from Alaska men who peruse Craigslist looking for women.  They got mine, but not for the reason they were intending.

But, man, if any of them had not been 50 years younger than me and had her hands on a chainsaw…

Alaska man seeks woman with chainsaw
Another chainsaw plea

Birthdays

Different boats, different burgees, different centuries, same guy.

Only wish I could say 30 years before the mast.  The one on the left was made on my 40th birthday, the one on the right within a couple of weeks of 30 years later which would be today,  On that day in 1982 I woke up 1,000 miles off Cape Mendocino, California, to a cabin filled with balloons, a few small, tastefully chosen gifts and 24 hours off watch to enjoy the half rack of Olympia Beer and the jug of tomato juice my shipmates had brought for the occasion.  I liked red beer in those days.  The one on the right was taken in late September this year on a boat in Southeastern Alaska by one of the people who was there in 1982 also. But, today woke up in a borrowed house alone and planning to head later to Dairy Queen and get one of those ice cream cakes they are famous for.  Life does take us on strange courses, doesn't it?

Boot battle joined by U.S. senator

What the well-dressed concert bassist will wear.
Photo by Jerrianne Lowther

XTRATUF Boots were originally developed in the 1960s for fishermen on the West Coast. Today they are worn for commercial fishing, canneries, general outdoor, casual wear and for fashion in Alaska! –XTRATUFcatalogue

Fashion indeed!

Now no less a personage than Alaska's Sen. Mark Begich has entered the fray.  He has written a letter to the president of the XTRATUFF  parent company raising Alaskans' complaints about the failure of boots manufactured in China.  In addition, Begich offered to work with the company to make it profitable to return to the United States and manufacture in this country.  And, he invited the company's officer to testify to Congress about the difficulties of competing and suggest ways the problem could be fixed.  Among other things the senator told the president of Honeywell, "People replacing boots that used to last for years found the new pairs leaked and the soles separated from the uppers after just a few weeks wear. These were not the durable boots Alaskans were used to, earning the new name: 'SORT-OF-TUFs."

There's a post on this blog dated July 24, 2012, about XTRATUF boots,  how they are the iconic choice of Alaska fishermen and how they are now being manufactured in China with less than satisfactory results.

That post highlighted the immediate problem but didn't really explain how deeply the foul-weather boots are woven into the Alaska fabric and even Alaska fashion as mentioned by the excerpt from the company's catalogue above.

Ubiquitous in the rain-soaked towns of Southeastern Alaska they often are called sneakers with the town attached, as in Ketchikan sneakers, Sitka sneakers and on and on, pick your town.  Most likely  any Alaskan who has anything to do with water owns at least one pair, from the guys on the Deadliest Catch boats in the Bering Sea to the school teacher walking to work in the rain in Ketchikan.  On my recent trip to Southeastern, I began to feel underdressed because I wasn't wearing them.

As far as fashion goes, it's no accident they are colored brown to go with their partners in Alaska outerwear the Carhartt coverall.  And they defy the rule of not wearing brown shoes with black.  When it's raining, brown is fine with whatever color you want.  People have been married wearing them.

They are a less common sight in Anchorage, most likely stored away in the closet most of the time until the owner heads out across the muskeg or joins a friend on a boat.  But, the recent storms, rain and flooding have probably led more than a few people to dust off their boots and at least consider wearing them.

My friend Jerrianne Lowther caught these two women walking along a sidewalk in East Anchorage recently, at least one of them going to or coming from some sort of performance with her bass.  Nice thing about that bass is if there were a flood that case would probably float long enough to take her to safety, while her concert footwear kept her feet warm and dry.

Wait, what did you say?

I am about the very last person you could call a minion of god.  But wait until you read what happened today.

I went in for my semi annual haircut and was guided to a chair by a beautiful young woman.  As she draped the cape around me she was talking with her coworker at the next chair.  She was complaining about a customer who had given her a hard time.  Apparently the woman was more than a customer because the barber/beautician was saying she had been to this woman's house and done favors for her and the woman had apparently treated her very poorly.  She also said the woman was suffering from cancer and had just had a double mastectomy. Kidding, she threatened to shave one side of the woman's head when she came in again.

She finally calmed down and asked me how my day was going.  It being a beautiful crisp fall day, I asked her what could go wrong on a day like that.  She offered some polite response and just kidding I said, and I am going to be very nice to you.  It was loud enough I guess that others heard me.  She asked why and I said I don't want to do something to get on your bad side with those clippers in your hand.  "You mean like carving my initials in the back of your head?" she asked with a giggle. One person you never anger is a barber. I heard a laugh from somewhere behind me.

She laughed too. Whew.  Then I went somewhere else.

I said it probably is none of my business and I certainly don't know the woman you are talking about but, I have a friend who is suffering a very serious type of cancer, and she gets testy and angry now and then and says things in anger that I know she doesn't mean.  And isn't anger the first stage in that Kubler-Ross litany about disease. It is the disease and the drugs talking, and I take that in stride and let it pass.  Try giving her a little room to be angry, she is going through a tough time.

Then the woman barber said something I never would have expected: "You know," she said, "sometimes I think God puts someone in my chair for a reason.  Thank you."

Wait, what did she say?  Now, go back and read that sentence again slowly.  That's how long it took what she said to register in my mind.  Me? Placed there by God?

It's a good thing my head was down while she was running the clippers over the back of my neck so no one could see my reaction. As responses raced through my mind, I eventually settled on not saying anything.

But, as she finished and took the cape off me, I stood up to give them the full impact of my 70 years and to ease the emotion I was feeling, told the, now, five women who were listening, "And, I am taking her to a Lady Gaga concert."  Get this.  They didn't laugh.  The youngest of them said, "that's funny" but the rest smiled and just said things sincerely like "that's great."  One of them even said, "wow, everybody loves Lady Gaga."

Who could have expected a trip to the barber would inspire such an impact on an old, bald guy?