Thursday, April 21, 2016

Green Day 2016

Mountainside snow provides backdrop for the Green.
It happened overnight. Having grown weary of meth addiction, detoxing, and general young-woman angst, as I woke up this morning I searched for some other occupation for my mind at least for a while. There was this letter that needed to be mailed but it seemed difficult to justify a drive into town, 20 miles round trip to post a letter, especially since I had made the same trip just the day before.

Then the thought of driving around the countryside looking for any sandhill cranes that might have stopped in the fields on their way to nesting spots farther north. So, I threw the camera into the Jeep and took off.

It only dawned on me when I had almost made it halfway to town. Everything was green. It hadn't been like that just one day earlier; to paraphrase the Mamas and the Poppas, all the trees were brown and the sky was gray Wednesday. Everything has been earlier this year but this came as a surprise. Green Day is supposed to happen in May.

Green Day! For those who haven't seen the explanation before, there is a day in spring when seemingly overnight all the buds in the deciduous trees turn green and the forest canopy takes on a definite green hue. Farther north people call it green-up. That usually happens in May. For example, Green Day was May 17 in 2012 and May 12 in 2011. In the years I have been watching and documenting, it has never happened in April and there are still
 Fairbanks NWS Chart shows average greenup days there.
10 days left in this month. Greenup in the Fairbanks area happened five days later on the 26th.

So, after I left that vital piece of mail at the Post Office, I headed out into the farmlands in search of cranes, but also now looking for a good illustration of Green Day. The first didn't take long, the latter never happened. Sunshine covered the landscape and highlighted the green in the trees, the white on the higher mountainsides but never touched a crane in this valley as far as I could see.

There's a lot going on in this picture. Overhead
a hang glider flies by.  The white in the lower
center is the reindeer about to give birth. In the
background is the Butte itself.
I made a wide circle among the fields, many with tractors working in them, on my way home and since I had to pass the reindeer farm that's about two miles from my house, I thought maybe there would be some calves around. At the fence I pulled off the road where a few adults were grazing nearby. I made a few snapshots but nothing worth saving. Most were on their feet nibbling at the short grass, but one I noticed had laid down and was not moving much, not a very interesting photography subject at all.

I was about to pack it in when I saw a hang glider come into view off the top of the Butte itself. I followed it around through the lens and made a couple of pictures, but again, nothing worth saving. I had gone back to the car and started packing the camera equipment away for the trip home when I chanced to look across the field and saw that one reindeer stand up. As I watched a large dark object dropped out and onto the ground. Holy Crap! She just had a calf. I had to change lenses in a hurry and hustle back to the fence where I was able to watch her clean the calf, watch it take its first halting steps, falling down a couple of times and then finally standing on fairly solid legs, all in a matter of 10 minutes or so.

Who needs cranes? What a treat to watch such a rite of spring, and on Green Day of all days. I watched that cow and calf for some time, then left them after half an hour or so and headed on home, but for the first time feeling the promise of spring. As I drove away I noticed at least four more reindeer lying down in the pasture, the promise of more calves coming soon.
Shortly after the birth, the calf is able to stand fairly steadily.
 Alaska Reindeer Farm      Green Day 2012     Green Day 2011

Sunday, April 17, 2016

And fire season is ON!

There's smoke from the fire in the "remote area" AT THE END MY STREET!

Here we go again. KTUU television reported a 10-acre fire burning in "a remote area near the Knik River" today. The GD river is 25 MILES LONG and I live near the Knik River. For crying out loud, where along those 25 miles is the fire?


Orange marks Leaf Lake, the general fire area. White marks
my house.
It's called the Leaf Lake fire and after a minimal search I located Leaf Lake. It's on the south side of the river, 4.9 miles from the Butte. That puts it about 2.9 miles east of my house. Easterly winds are common in this area, though it's calm today. If winds pick up it would blow this way for sure. For those familiar with the area, Jim Creek shows up on the same map. So if the wind kicks up, I (and a ton of neighbors) are in direct line with the fire.
And that's just the people. With all the lakes and wetlands in the area, it is prime habitat for nesting swans, geese, ducks and many other birds.  

Why can't news people go one step further and give an accurate location? Near a river indeed. At least tell us which side of the river. Next we'll hear of a fire near the Yukon River. 

No reason to panic, no wind and the smoke appears to be drifting to the north. Maybe time to look around the house for a safety zone and then a mental inventory of what to take if evacuation becomes necessary.

UPDATE AT 6:30 PM: Here's an update on the Leaf Lake Fire outside of Palmer:
Smoke jumpers called in. BLM photo.
The fire has not grown substantially and is still estimated at 10 acres. A helicopter has been dropping water on the fire most of the afternoon and that work has been effective in slowing growth of the fire, with the exception of occasional uphill runs on the slope it is burning on. Winds have been fairly light at 5-7 mph with gusts to 8 mph and temperatures in the low 60s. Relative humidity has been in the high 20s.
There are nine people on scene - 7 smokejumpers and 2 State Forestry personnel - and three more DOF firefighters should be arriving shortly via helicopter. A second helicopter will join the fray tonight for transport and bucket work, also.Fortunately there is a lake at the base of the slope the fire is burning on so it makes for quick turnaround time.
The forecast is calling for windier conditions tomorrow afternoon, which could provide a test for firefighters.

ANOTHER: A lot less smoke over that way at 8:30 p.m.

UPDATE: 4/18:  Bit of an update Monday: No smoke visible from the house today. Drove the four-wheeler down to the river where there's a less obstructed view of the area and couldn't spot any smoke from there either. Size was updated to 25 acres due to better mapping, not spread. Cause has been listed as "human," but no more detail than that. Guessing that it's under control, Wind blowing upriver away from the house. Several reports today say fire is still being fought, generating lots of smoke, but no flame visible at least from the air. KTUU still locates it "near the Knik River."

UPDATE 4/19: Wildfire east of Butte making headway on its containment.

Alaska DNR- Division of Forestry (DOF)
3 hrs
The 25-acre Leaf Lake Fire near the Knik River outside Palmer (4.9 miles due east of the Butte) is now 80 percent contained and fire managers are projecting 100 percent containment by the end of the operational shift today if the winds don't get too strong. The 13 personnel working on the fire have mopped up 20-30 feet in around the fire and are concentrating on the lower end of the fire.


4/19 3 p.m.: This post from earlier in the day says it will be contained if the winds don't get too strong. Unfortunately at 3 p.m. winds have picked up considerably. River basin is full of a dust cloud (hope that's not smoke) and no report yet of how this has affected the fire. Oh yeah, it is blowing from the east directly toward this area.

4/20 A.M.: LEAF LAKE FIRE ALMOST OUT: Fire personnel continued to work the interior where fire activity was observed as smoldering and creeping in the unburned fuels. Winds picked up around 1400 with gusts of up to 20 mph, however, personnel were still able to achieve their goals. The fire was called contained at 1626, and plans for today consist of demobing the seven smokejumpers, while still planning for a complete demob of the fire by Thursday.

UPDATE 4/21: Fire personnel continued their mop-up operations throughout the day. 7 smokejumpers and 2 additional firefighters were demobed off the fire, and complete demob is scheduled for today, 4/21. Total cost to date: $105,643.

Alaska wildfire information

Thursday, April 14, 2016

The Alaska Tuxedo

          Here's a photo of Alaska's former U.S. Rep Don Young
            decked out in genuine Filson threads that make up
           the Alaska Tuxedo. Notice the bag and the logo on
             the wall.
There are a lot of stories going around and a lot of opinions on just what an Alaska tuxedo amounts to. These days people claim any Carhartts suit will do, or any plaid shirt. But the folks who reallly know, say it's the Filson Company pants and jackets that make up the true tuxedo. How do I know, I met the guy who was there when they were invented. Here's his story. – TJ

THE ALASKA TUXEDO

AUGUSTUS BIRCH-ALDER

Some time ago a magazine lady come to a friend of mine askin' about the Alaska tuxedo.  Now my friend's got some knowledge about Alaska and such, but he don't know everything.  He let her know about me and eventually she come to ask me the same question.  Now as you kin probbly tell I ain't much for writin' things down and if'n you think my language ain't so great, you oughta see what my chicken scratchin's is like.  Well, I come to know about the question and when I got the chance to be near one of these typewriter machines, I let her know what I know about the Alaska tuxedo.  See, I was there when they invented it.  Real funny how it happened.  Most of those boys is long gone now.  I guess I'm about the only one left who was there that night. So I get to write the history.

Happened back in the early Twennies.  Me and Spuds McWhortle was up the Koyukuk prospectin'.  Spuds had just broke with his partner Gravy Dickens the winter before and me and him set up our stake and headed upriver after breakup to look over some creeks up that way.  We hit a little pay along the way, but nothin' like we wanted until too late in the season to do anything about it.  They's a little crick up there just past the Alatna that hit our fancy and we begun working our way up it, takin' a pan here and there until we got near this little waterfall.  In the basin under that trickle we come across dust – maybe $25 to the pan and commenced to doin' some serious diggin'.  Spuds and me worked hardern' we ever remembered, we was so concentrated we wasn't payin' attention to the signs and freezeup caught us.  We'd planned to build a raft to get down but we come out of the tent one morning and durned if that creek hadn't froze all the way down to the Koyukuk and the river was about to seize up too.

So, whut we planned was to hike out over the ice hauling a sled with as much gear as we could.  The rest of our stuff we planned to leave 'cause we was sure comin' back to that crick in the spring.  We washed out all our clothes for the trip downriver and that's when we found we wasn't the only ones surprised by freezeup.  Now I don't know how much you all know about this sort of stuff, so I'll explain a little here.

When you wash clothes in the winter time, you hang 'em outside 'til they freeze, then you bring 'em inside and stand 'em up by the stove and by the time they thaw, they're dry.  Well, Spuds left the clothes out overnight and in the morning we got one of them Alaska surprises.  We come out of the tent and the whole place had been tromped over and everything but the tent itself was ripped to shreds.  Only one thing coulda done that and we knowed instantly it was a big old bear come through our camp that night.  Spuds' clothes line was ripped down and that fool griz had ate my long johns.  They say there's nothin' meaner than a bear out in winter and I think I can now say that's true.  Can you think of anything so cold and so mean he'd be hungry enough to eat a man's long johns, specially after they been wore a whole summer doin' hard labor.  This was one mean griz. I mean there wasn't nothin' left of them long johns enough to cover a kneecap.  We got to thinkin' we might not want to be there when them longhandles started actin' up in his stomach.  He was mean enough already.  So, we packed everything that was left in a big hurry and made tracks downriver.

There we was with winter comin' on bigtime and I had to make this hike without long johns of any sort.  It was cold and there was another problem, too.  I don't suppose any of you ever wore a pair of them heavy wool trousers like we used to have.  Them things weighed a ton, took two sets of suspenders and a belt to hold them up, specially after a summer's work and I was so skinny from it all.  It took all that to hold 'em up and that was without change and dust in the pockets.  Also, they was made of the roughest kind of wool imagineable and that come to be the big rub.

I tell you we trudged for days down that crick and then down the Koyukuk to the Yukon.  We was hopin' to catch the last of the riverboats up to Fairbanks, but we was too late.  Took us two weeks to the Big Yu and surefire, time we come to it, she was froze as solid as that old grizzly's brain.  We traded some dust for grub at the post there in Koyukuk, stashed some more gear and headed upriver for Fairbanks where we planned to winter out.

By this time that other problem with them pants was becomin' a real pain, if you know what I mean.  All that walkin' with that scratchy fabric in them stovepipe trousers swishin' back and forth was havin' an effect on my pore legs.  Time come we was in quite a parade of folks headin' for the Tanana and Fairbanks.  One of the folks we run into was Gravy, Spuds' old pardner.  Didn't take long 'fore they was squabblin' about this axe handle and that stove and they almost come to blows afore I stepped atwixt them.  That little Gravy ripped my shirt in the process and I tell you, I couldn't spare the threads.  We finally picked him up and dumped him in a snowbank and we continued on, me with even more ventilation than before.  Mind you this was early winter but it got down to the 40s below some of them nights on the river.  With them extra holes in my clothes, and them pants rippin' my thighs to bloody meat, we flat hustled for town.

We finally come upon Fairbanks and what a sight that town was, growing up along that slough all fancy and modern as a little town in Alaska could be.  It had some high-falutin' ideas, too.  All the boys was there.  Champagne Ricky was up from Kantishna country.  The Slough Goose come over from the flats.  Angus McQuarts must hit it big that summer 'cause when we come down Two Street he was marchin' along, blowin' his bagpipe scarin' wimmin and their kids right off the street.  He's the one told us about a big dance party comin' up that very night.

Now you might not think two guys just hiked all the way from the Alatna to Fairbanks'd in any shape to do no dancin', but I don't expect you kids comin' to Alaska these days know what it's like out there on the creeks all summer with just another smelly old sourdough to keep you company.  We'd get dizzy just tryin' to stay upwind from each other.  And, once we come out and got a chance to mingle with other folks and maybe some of them other folks is of the other gender, well, they ain't no tired in the world gonna stop us.

So, we was fired up for Angus' dance.  I even tried to tap a few steps right there in the middle of the street but I had to stop 'cause it was then I realized how bad them pants had tore up my legs.  See, all that rough wool rubbin' against my tender thighs for all them days just about tore the hide off me.  If I was going to do any dancing I was going to need some patchin' up.  And, I was going to need some new pants.

First thing we done was head over to Mizz Marble's bathhouse to get the dust off and trim a little hair here and there.  I soaked for about four hours, but I never got no redder than my thighs already was.  Mizz Marble, she gives me some salve to put on my wounded legs and that helped some.  She was all up for that dance, too and she told us the ladies of that town wasn't goin' to put up with no poorly dressed miners and we'd best be gettin' us some formal type threads or they wouldn't even let us into that dance. We paid up and then we went over to Spickle's store to see about some dancin' clothes.  Now, a guy lives like we do ain't got room in his outfit to be packin' around nothin' like a dancin' suit and even if he did, ours probbly woulda been tore up by that bear.  And I fore sure wasn't puttin' them wool pants back on.

Time we got to Spickle's and lookin' over his wares, he'd sold out most of his fancy duds.  There was enough guys in from the cricks with dust and everybody was gettin' gussied up.  He had a couple of them banker suits left but me and Spuds couldn't see much sense in buyin' one of them just to go for one dance.  Old man Spickle, seein' we was doin' a good job of resistin' spending any of our dust says he's got an idea.  Now Spickle's got this wife, well, she don't really belong in the country.  Mrs. Spickle, now she's a story in herself, come down from Dawson where they say she did more than just clean house if you know what I mean.  She's got more city ideas than Fairbanks can accommodate, I mean she reads things like fashion magazines and such and always dresses up.  Spickle asks his wife what she thinks would be the right stuff for us and she hauls out one of them magazines.  I'm sure they was both winking at each other, too.  She reads how this one fashion place says men's clothes should be what she called functional and geographical and how the clothes should fit the man, more than just fit, if you know what I mean. So, Spickle, right on her cue, trots out these olive colored Filson pants and says to me try 'em on.  I did that and then he shows me a nice wool plaid shirt about the same as the airbag on them bagpipes Angus plays.  They all looked me up and down and then Mrs. Spickle says it's missin' something so she comes up with this fancy lookin' piece of strung and ties a bow around my neck.

I musta looked pretty silly all told cause as they started to looked me up and down, they also started to smilin', then they started gigglin, then they all broke into real laughter.  Then Spickle plops this bowler on my head and they all crack up.  Just about this time, Ricky comes in and he's been celebratin' a little and he wants to know what's all that funny.  So they tell him they're me up for the dance and they falls to gigglin' all over again.

Ricky looks me over real good and then says he don't see what's all that funny, if that ain't an Alaska tuxedo, then he don't know what is.  And if a man can't wear an Alaska tuxedo and get in anyplace he wants to go, then the place ain't worth goin' into.  He says he'd just as soon have one, too, if they've got his size and they did and by that time Spuds decides he'll have one too and when we left, Spickle himself was looking for a waist size that'd get around him.

We paid up again and headed down Two Street to the saloon where the boys was gettin' ready for the dance.  A couple of them give me a pretty good ribbin' but when they seen the women eyein' us up to dance, they was askin' where they could come across a similar suit.  We told them it's called an Alaska tuxedo and Spickle's is havin' a sale.  We done some good advertisin' for that little store, 'cause by the time come for the dance, Spickle's sold out all them pants that had probbly been layin' around that store for the past ten years or so.  By the time we come to the dance hall, there's only about one guy in the whole town ain't wearin' one of them suits, except Angus, of course, 'cause he's got to wear his kilts.  The one other guy turns out to be the man takin' tickets to get into that dance.  He takes one look at them suits we was wearin' and says something like it ain't suitable attire for his dance  Now every one of the men in that town was wearin' them twill pants and plaid shirts and them string ties.  A couple of the rougher women had 'em on, too.  While we was stopped there at the door, McKinley-hip Martha shoved her way through the crowd to confront this fancy little ticket taker.  She allows as how she wants to dance and how she wants to dance with a man, not some panty waist in a waistcoat.  She says if he wants to dance with someone like an Alaska woman, he better go get the proper suit himself, and she pitches him into the nearest snowbank.  Then we all filed into that dancehall, leavin' our dollar at the door, just like the little dude mighta still been there.

I don't have to tell you we all had a grand time at that dance and from then on them tuxedos that Ricky named was the thing to wear if a guy wanted to get formal.  I hear they's a couple places in them cities now don't allow a fellow in if he's wearin' one.  Sure hope I never wander into one by mistake 'cause even at my age I could probbly tear up one of them citified joints.  Ain't no place in Alaska for that kind.

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Owl house is a very, very fine house …

In place and ready for occupants the very next day.

With apologies to Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, look what I built. I had been thinking about it for several years and finally did something about it a couple of days ago, hit the lumber yard and built it yesterday.

I might be a little late already but I am going to give it a try. The drill motor battery didn't have enough oomph left to generate the torque necessary to make that 4-inch circular blade cut or I would be finished by now. Just have to cut the hole and paint and mount it in a tree. Then I can wait to see if it lures an owl. Might have to wait for next year.

Later that same day.
It might be a little bigger than necessary. Around here I could expect boreal or Saw whet owls which are tiny and this is designed for the next size up which would be a western screech owl. I figured the little ones could get into this nesting box, but the screech owl couldn't get into the smaller one. We'll see what happens.

I'm kind of hoping I don't get a saw whet owl. Years ago in another town, I heard this strange call from the woods, a constant beep beep beep going on for hours. With a little research I learned it was a saw whet owl, but also that their range extended only as far north as southeastern Alaska. I lived 500 miles from there and it hit me that this little guy might have been hooting the loneliest bachelor call in the world being he was so far from the nearest female. The beeping grew old in a hurry. That constant toot toot toot kept me awake at night, irritated me before I fully woke up in the morning and just kept going on and on. I thought this might be a substitute for waterboarding. I could do without one beeping in my backyard here. Just to show you what I mean, here's a clip of that sound: (In reality the calls are a lot louder than this.)



To tell the truth though I would be happy with any type of owl that chooses to reside and perhaps nest and raise young in this fancy new condo. You could call it affordable housing even. Watch this space.
These are the dimensions in case anyone is interested. The smaller one is about an inch shorter all the way around and has a 3-inch entry hole. Plan is from the 50birds.com website.
I think my all-time favorite sighting, and this has happened more than once, occurs at the East Pole. Looking down the hill at night, a full moon casting shadows across sparkling snow and among the trees a great horned owl glides on silent wings pursuing his nightly hunt.

Owl be seeing you in the polar vortex

Monday, April 4, 2016

The meme is the massage

This meme is the perfect illustration of how the rich steal from the middle class and then convince the middle class to blame the poor.

It is meant to vilify the poor hamburger flipper who supposedly is taking away from the others by demanding $15 an hour for his work, when what is really wrong here is the other three are grossly underpaid. It's interesting to note that all three are public servants, paid by government entities that across the nation have done everything they can to neutralize their labor unions.

What's sad is people keep posting this message and commenting on the posts without really questioning what it means. The poor, the hamburger flippers and the 7-11 clerks, the Walmart employees who qualify for food stamps and, yes, even those on welfare are not the bad guys here. The bad guys are the city officials who would only pay a policeman $18.27 an hour or the fireman, $16.04 an hour or the paramedic $15.59 an hour. Think about what those people do, and the risks some of them take to protect the public and then try to defend those wages. Those wages are indefensible and those people are not paid by the same people who pay hamburger flippers so the only penalty those public servants suffer is it costs them the nickel more they have to pay for a Big Mac because they can't afford a decent meal.

But the buck doesn't stop with public officials strapped for funding just to keep their city services operating. Think at least one step further. Where does the money to fund government services come from? It comes from taxpayers and when you have huge corporations taking billions in subsidies from the government and paying little or no taxes on their income, there is where the disconnect is.

But the titans of industry have managed to wage and are winning the war of the minds when somebody posts a meme like this one blaming the hamburger flipper for wanting a living wage.

What is equally sad is there are so many people willing to believe this without question. Want to find a culprit again? It would be easy to blame the education system. We are not teaching our kids to think and question so when something like this on the surface appears to confirm the fears and insecurities that come up from every angle, they believe it without the slightest hesitation.

And who controls the purse strings for education? Follow the same path to the same institutions. In a way by squeezing education (and blaming underpaid teachers in the process) the outcome is a dumbing down of the general population which in turn makes it easier to manipulate and the whole corrupting influence goes deeper into the fabric or our supposedly democratic society.

This part of the process is particularly dismaying. I know the young fellow who posted that meme on his facebook page. That is how I came to see it this time. He is a contemporary of my son's and a young man over whom I had some bit of influence. I think now if I had only had the foresight to at least encourage him to question and challenge things, maybe he wouldn't be believing and passing on this sort of propaganda.

And that's all it really is, propaganda, an effort published through innocents to gain even more control over the economy and fill the vaults in foreign countries with American money produced by underpaid American labor and often from profits made by selling to Americans, to satisfy the unmitigated greed of the one percenters.

During the Vietnam War and civil rights demonstrations in the 1960s a particular message kept showing up on demonstrators' signs. It read: "Question everything." Perhaps it's time to wave that sign again.

The Medium is the Massage by Marshall McLuhan

Sunday, April 3, 2016

Back in 1970 the thing was no comma at the end of a series

Everyone who writes or edits has some absolutes they just won't put up with. I come loaded with them, but when I went back to editing in my 60s, I found the new generations had new ones but were just as insistent about them. One of mine was the use of "on" with a day or date as in "on Tuesday" or on "Jan. 15." A journalism professor had insisted on leaving it out, saying, "you can't stand on a day," and over 35 years of editing I have been dutifully removing them. One night in that most recent stint, I took several "ons" out of a story. Later I saw a page proof that had been gone over by a kid fresh out of college with a whole new set of that type of irritant. He had dutifully put all the "ons" back into the story. As I had the last look, I didn't let them go back in.  One of the worst new ones I saw was some guy on line who went apoplectic every time he saw two spaces after a sentence instead of one. That guy was headed for a heart attack before he was 40.

Where do these come from? Many of them are drilled into us as students. Others we pick up on the way. A new one I would edit out every time I see it is lately writers and newscasters cannot help saying "back in" as in "back in 1998." You see and hear it everywhere and it is totally unnecessary. "In 1998" is fine and if print media are trying to save space they can save two words every time a date comes up. Think of the miles of newsprint and gallons of ink saved if editors everywhere removed those two words every time they see them.

What's kind of silly about an editor's foibles is most of these tiny ones don't matter at all. Does the substance change if there are two spaces after a sentence instead of one? Does it make any difference to the story whether a guy does it Wednesday or on Wednesday? Does the time frame change if something happened in 1998 rather than back in 1998? Nope. These things seem to go in cycles anyway. Take the oxford comma. I was taught you leave that last comma out of a series because the commas only indicate the missing "and" between other items in that series. You leave it out when the series ends with "and something." And I can remember the horror on the face of the teacher when I told a class of fourth grade writing students you didn't put that comma in. But whether the comma is there or not doesn't matter to the meaning either. Maybe age has mellowed me but I just let that stuff go any more. There is enough to do without splitting hairs over a comma or a space.

So what brought this on? I am editing a story and part of the story is about editing, so it is double indemnity. I had written this: "I have this fancy new weather thing …." I had a high school English teacher who insisted "thing" should never be used.  There is always a more detailed substitute. Never write "thing." So when I saw it the alarm went off. The context and other constraints didn't allow a detailed description of the instrument which has an outdoor sensor that broadcasts the reading to a bedside monitor. So I changed "thing" to "device." Then what hit me was what more does that tell a reader? If you think about it, "device" really means "thing." It is no more specific. And, for that matter so does "instrument," though both seem to sound and look better but neither tells the reader any more except perhaps by inference. Unable to come up with anything better, I stuck with device.

That teacher also instilled another trigger in me. She said every time you see a version of the verb "to be" change it. That is simply a state of being, says only something is standing there doing nothing. Her advice was every time you write "is" or "was" look for an active verb. That advice has served me well over the years and a couple of reviewers have pointed out my use of verbs as something positive in my writing. Often finding an active verb takes very little time.

Well I was going to go on about editors' rules but it is time to get back to work. Or, I intended to go on about editors' rules but more important obligations call me back to work.

Best headlines ever

Naked pair fed LSD gummy worm to dog

Owners of a Noah's Ark replica file a lawsuit over rain damage

In Southcentral Alaska earthquake, damage originated in the ground, engineers say

A headline that could only be written in Alaska: At state cross country, Glacier Bears and Grizzlies sweep, Lynx repeat, Wolverines make history — and a black bear crosses the trail

Man kills self before shooting wife and daughter

Alabama governor candidate caught in lesbian sperm donation scandal

Sister hits moose on way to visit sister who hit moose.

Man caught driving stolen car filled with radioactive uranium, rattlesnake, whiskey

Man loses his testicles after attempting to smoke weed through a SCUBA tank

Church Mutual Insurance won't cover Church's flood damage because it's 'an act of God'

Homicide victims rarely talk to police

Meerkat Expert Attacked Monkey Handler Over Love Affair with Llama Keeper

GOP congressman opposes gun control because gay marriage leads to bestiality

Owner of killer bear chokes to death on sex toy

Support for legalizing pot hits all-time high

Give me all your money or my penguin will explode

How zombie worms have sex in whale bones

Crocodile steals zoo worker's lawn mower

Woman shot by oven while trying to cook waffles

Nude beach blowjob jet ski fight leads to wife's death

Woman stabs husband with squirrel for not buying beer Christmas Eve

GOPer files complaint against Democrat for telling the truth about Big Lie social posts

Man shot dead on Syracuse Street for 2nd time in 2 days

Alaska woman punches bear in face, saves dog

Johnny Rotten suffers flea bite on his penis after rescuing squirrel

Memorable quotations

The best way to know you are having an adventure is when you wish you were home talking about it." — a mechanic on the Alaska State Ferry System. Or as in my own case planning how I will be writing it on this blog.

"You can't promote principled anti-corruption without pissing off corrupt people." — George Kent

"If only the British had held on to the airports, the whole thing might have gone differently for us." — Mick Jagger

"You can do anything as long as you don't scare the horses." — a mother's favorite saying recalled by a friend

A poem is an egg with a horse inside” — anonymous fourth grader

“My children will likely turn my picture to the wall but what the hell, you only get old once." — Joe May

“Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.” — Ernest Hemingway

When I write, I feel like an armless, legless man with a crayon in his mouth. Kurt Vonnegut

“If you wrote something for which someone sent you a cheque, if you cashed the cheque and it didn't bounce, and if you then paid the light bill with the money, I consider you talented.”Stephen King

The thing about ignorance is, you don't have to remain ignorant. — me again"

"It was like the aftermath of an orgasm with the wrong partner." – David Lagercrants “The Girl in the Spider’s Web.”

Why worry about dying, you aren't going to live to regret it.

Never debate with someone who gets ink by the barrel" — George Hayes, former Alaska Attorney General who died recently

My dear Mr. Frost: two roads never diverge in a yellow wood. Three roads meet there. — @Shakespeare on Twitter

Normal is how somebody else thinks you should act.

"The mark of a great shiphandler is never getting into situations that require great shiphandling," Adm. Ernest King, USN

Me: Does the restaurant have cute waitresses?

My friend Gail: All waitresses are cute when you're hungry.

I'm not a writer, but sometimes I push around words to see what happens. – Scott Berry

I realized today how many of my stories start out "years ago." What's next? Once upon a time?"

“The rivers of Alaska are strewn with the bones of men who made but one mistake” - Fred McGarry, a Nushagak Trapper

Many people hear voices when no one is there. Some of them are called mad and are shut up in rooms where they stared at walls all day. Others are called writers and they do pretty much the same thing. – Meg Chittenden

A non-writing writer is a monster courting insanity. – Franz Kafka

We are all immortal until the one day we are not. – me again

If the muse is late, start without her – Peter S. Beagle

Substitute ‘damn’ every time you’re inclined to write ‘very;’ your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be. ~Mark Twain Actually you could do the same thing with the word "really" as in "really cold."

If you are looking for an experience that will temper your vanity, this is it. There's no one to impress when you're alone on the trap line. – Michael Carey quoting his father's journal

Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing. – Benjamin Franklin

It’s nervous work. The state you need to write in is the state that others are paying large sums of money to get rid of. – Shirley Hazzard

So far as I can remember, there is not one word in the Gospels in praise of intelligence -- Bertrand Russell

You know that I always just wanted to have a small ship to take stuff from a place that had a lot of that stuff to a place that did not have a lot of that stuff and so prosper.—Jackie Faber, “The Wake of the Lorelei Lee”

If you attack the arguer instead of the argument, you lose both

If an insurance company won’t pay for damages caused by an “act of God,” shouldn’t it then have to prove the existence of God? – I said that

I used to think getting old was about vanity—but actually it’s about losing people you love. Getting wrinkles is trivial. – Eugene O’Neill

German General to Swiss General: “You have only 500,000 men in your army; what would you do if I invaded with 1 million men?”

Swiss General: “Well, I suppose every one of my soldiers would need to fire twice.”

Writing is the only thing that when I do it, I don’t feel I should be doing something else.—Gloria Steinem

Exceed your bandwidth—sign on the wall of the maintenance shop at the West Coast/Alaska Tsunami Warning Center

One thing I do know, if you keep at it, you usually wind up getting something done.—Patricia Monaghan

Do you want to know what kind of person makes the best reporter? I’ll tell you. A borderline sociopath. Someone smart, inquisitive, stubborn, disorganized, chaotic, and in a perpetual state of simmering rage at the failings of the world.—Brett Arends

It is a very simple mind that only knows how to spell a word one way.—Andrew Jackson

3:30 is too late or too early to do anything—Rene Descartes

Everything is okay when it’s 50-below as long as everything is okay. – an Alaskan in Tom Walker’s “The Seventymile Kid”

You can have your own opinion but you can’t have your own science.—commenter arguing on a story about polar bears and global warming

He looks at three ex wives as a good start—TV police drama

Talkeetna: A friendly little drinking town with a climbing problem.—a handmade bumper sticker

“You’re either into the wall or into the show”—Marco Andretti on giving it all to qualify last at the 2011 Indy 500

Makeup is not for the faint of heart—the makeup guerrilla

“I’m going to relax in a very adult manner.”—Danica Patrick after sweating it out and qualifying half an hour before Andretti

“Asking Congress to come back is like asking a mugger to come back because he forgot your wallet.”—a roundtable participant on Fox of all places

As Republicans go further back in the conception process to define when life actually begins, I am beginning to think the eventual definition will be life begins in the beer I was drinking when I met her.—me again

Hunting is a “critical element for the long-term conservation of wood bison.”—a state department of Fish and Game official explaining why the state would not go along with a federal plan to reintroduce wood bison in Alaska because the agreement did not specifically allow hunting

Each day do something that won’t compute – anon

I can’t belive I still have to protest this shit – a sign carriend by an elderly woman at an Occupy demonstration

Life should be a little nuts or else it’s just a bunch of Thursdays strung together—Kevin Costner as Beau Burroughs in “Rumor has it”

You’re just a wanker whipping up fear —Irish President Michael D. Higgins to a tea party radio announcer

Being president doesn’t change who you are; it reveals who you are—Michelle Obama

Sports malaprops

Commenting on an athlete with hearing impairment he said the player didn’t show any “uncomfortability.” “He's not doing things he can't do."

"… there's a fearlessment about him …"

"He's got to have the lead if he's going to win this race." "

"Kansas has always had the ability to score with the basketball."

"NFL to put computer chips in balls." Oh, that's gotta hurt.

"Now that you're in the finals you have to run the race that's going to get you on the podium."

"It's very important for both sides that they stay on their feet."

This is why you get to hate sportscasters. Kansas beats Texas for the first time since 1938. So the pundits open their segment with the question "let's talk about what went wrong." Wrong? Kansas WON a football game! That's what went RIGHT!

"I brought out the thermostat to show you how cold it is here." Points to a thermometer reading zero in Minneapolis.

"It's tough to win on the road when you turn the ball over." Oh, really? Like you can do all right if you turn the ball over playing at home?

Cliches so embedded in sportscasters' minds they can't help themselves: "Minnesota fell from the ranks of the undefeated today." What ranks? They were the only undefeated team left.

A good one: A 5'10" player went up and caught a pass off a defensive back over six feet tall. The quote? "He's got some hops."

Best homonym of the day so far: "It's all tied. Alabama 34, Kentucky 3." Oh, Tide.

"Steve Hooker commentates on his Olympic pole vault gold medal." When "comments" just won't do.

"He's certainly capable of the top ten, maybe even higher than that."

"Atlanta is capable of doing what they're doing."

"Biyombo, one of seven kids from the Republic of Congo." In the NBA? In America? In his whole country?

"You can't come out and be aggressive but you can't come out and be unaggressive."

"They're gonna be in every game they play!"

"First you have to get two strikes on the hitter before you get the strikeout."

"The game ended in the final seconds." You have to wonder when the others ended or are they still going on?

How is a team down by one touchdown before the half "totally demoralized?"

"If they score runs they will win."

"I think the matchup is what it is"

After a play a Houston defender was on his knees, his head on the ground and his hand underneath him appeared to clutch a very sensitive part of the male anatomy. He rolled onto his back and quickly removed his hand. (Remember the old Cosby routine "you cannot touch certain parts of your body?") Finally they helped the guy to the sideline and then the replay was shown. In it the guy clearly took a hard knee between his thighs. As this was being shown, one of the announcers says, "It looks like he hurt his shoulder." The other agrees and then they both talk about how serious a shoulder injury can be. Were we watching the same game?

"Somebody is going to be the quarterback or we're going to see a new quarterback."

"That was a playmaker making a play.”